Be worried.

Discussion in 'Jokes and Games' started by eileen, May 6, 2011.

  1. eileen

    eileen Resident Taxonomist Staff Member Moderator Plants Contributor

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    This is a collection of letters sent to a South of England Newspaper who had asked for examples of stupidity


    IDIOT SIGHTING No.1

    My daughter and I went to the McDonald's drive through check-out window to pay our bill and I gave the clerk a £5 note. Our total bill was £4.20, so I also handed her a 20 pence piece.

    She said, 'You gave me too much money.'

    I said, 'Yes I know, but this way you can just give me £1 back.'

    She sighed and went to get the Manager who asked me to repeat my request.

    I did so, and he handed me back the 20 pence and said 'We're sorry but we do not do that kind of thing.'

    The clerk then proceeded to give me back 80 pence in change.


    Do not confuse the clerks at MacDonald's !!


    IDIOT SIGHTING No2

    We had to have the garage door repaired. The GARADOR repairman told us
    that one of our problems was that we did not have a 'large' enough motor on the opener.

    I thought for a moment, and said that we had the largest one GARADOR made at that time, a 1/2 horsepower.

    He shook his head and said, 'Lady, you need a 1/4 horsepower.'

    I responded that 1/2 was larger than 1/4 and he said, 'NOOO, it's not. Four is larger than two.'

    We haven't used Garador repair since. Happened in Moor Park, near Watford.



    IDIOT SIGHTING No3

    I live in a semi-rural area. We recently had a new neighbour call the
    Highways Department to request the removal of the 'DEER CROSSING' sign
    from our road.

    The reason: 'Too many deer are being hit by cars on this stretch of road! I don't
    think this is a good place for them to be crossing anymore.'


    Story from Potters Bar, Hertfordshire.



    IDIOT SIGHTING No 4

    My daughter went to a local Kentucky Fried Chicken and ordered a Taco. She asked the person behind the counter for 'minimal lettuce.'

    He said he was sorry, but they only had Iceberg Lettuce.


    From South Oxhey, Hertfordshire.



    IDIOT SIGHTING No 5

    I was at the airport, checking in at the gate when an airport employee asked, 'Has anyone put anything in your baggage without your knowledge?'

    To which I replied, 'If it was without my knowledge, how would I know?'

    He smiled knowingly and nodded, 'That's why we ask.'



    Happened at Luton Airport



    IDIOT SIGHTING No 6

    The traffic light on the corner buzzes when the lights turn red and it is safe to cross the road. I was crossing with an intellectually challenged friend of mine.

    She asked if I knew what the buzzer was for.

    I explained that it signals blind people when the light is red.

    Appalled, she responded, 'What on earth are blind people doing driving?!'

    She is a Local County Council employee in Harrow, Middlesex. (And she's NOT blonde)





    IDIOT SIGHTING No7

    When my husband and I arrived at our local Ford dealer to pick up our car, we were told the keys had been locked in it. We went to the Service Department and found a mechanic working feverishly to unlock the Driver's door. As I watched from the passenger side, I instinctively tried the door-handle and discovered that it was unlocked.



    'Hey,' I announced to the Fitter/Mechanic, 'it's open!'

    His reply: 'I know. I already did that side.'

    This was at the Ford dealership in St Albans, Hertfordshire.





    STAY ALERT! They walk among us.
     
    Philip Nulty likes this.
  2. thepondlady

    thepondlady In Flower

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    Blond is not just a hair color anymore!
    Common sense is not so common!
    Put you brain in gear "Before" you open your mouth!
    Too funny! I love it!
     
  3. marlingardener

    marlingardener Happy

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    Until now, I honestly thought that Texas had cornered the market on dumb.
    *Texas had a legislator who introduced a bill to allow the blind to hunt. With guns.
    *A local park sustained significant damage by flooding two years ago. When asked why grant money was spent on antique-type light poles, cement walks and expensive park benches right next to the creek, the town's response was,"We knew it was in a 100 year flood plain, but we didn't know the 100 years was up."
    Stupid is international!
     
  4. cherylad

    cherylad Countess of Cute-ification Plants Contributor

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    all are sadly too funny! :D
     
  5. SongofJoy57

    SongofJoy57 In Flower

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    LOL . . . this is too funny!
     

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