Dire warning for the ladies

Discussion in 'Jokes and Games' started by eileen, Mar 10, 2009.

  1. eileen

    eileen Resident Taxonomist Staff Member Moderator Plants Contributor

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    You've heard about people who have been abducted and had their kidneys removed by black-market organ thieves.
    Well, my thighs were stolen from me during the night a few years ago. I went to sleep and woke up with someone
    else's thighs.It was just that quick.
    The replacements had the texture of cooked oatmeal. Whose thighs were these and what happened to mine? I spent the entire summer looking for my thighs. Finally, hurt and angry, I resigned myself to living out my life in jeans.And then
    The thieves struck again.My bum was next. I knew it was the same gang, because they took pains to match my new rear-end to the thighs they had stuck me with earlier. But my new bum was attached at least three inches lower than my original! I realized I'd have to give up my jeans in favour of long skirts.
    Two years ago I realized my arms had been switched. One morning I was drying my hair and was horrified to see the flesh of my upper arm swing to and fro with the motion of the hairbrush. This was really getting scary - my body was being replaced one section at a time.What could they do to me next? When my poor neck suddenly disappeared and was replaced with a turkey neck, I decided to tell my story.

    Women of the world wake up and smell the coffee! Those 'plastic' surgeons are using REAL replacement body parts -stolen from you and me! The next time someone you know has something 'lifted', look again - was it lifted from you?
    THIS IS NOT A HOAX. This is happening to women everywhere every night.WARN YOUR FRIENDS!

    P.S. Last year I thought someone had stolen my Boobs. I was lying in bed and they were gone! But when I jumped out of bed, I was relieved to see that they had just been hiding in my armpits as I slept. Now I keep them hidden in my waistband.Thought this was too
    'important' not to pass on
    Have a wonderful day - with a joy filled heart.
    BTW - These same thieves come in my closet and shrank my clothes! How do they do it?
     
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  3. Droopy

    Droopy Slug Slaughterer Plants Contributor

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    :smt005 I just KNEW there had to be a perfectly rational explanation!
     
  4. Palm Tree

    Palm Tree Young Pine

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    So true

    I am having a great laugh here since my sister was complaining about the same symptoms hitting her and she was at a loss for an explanation.
    Eileen, you just gave me an explanation that I must share with her. Hehehehehe
     
  5. playtime8978

    playtime8978 In Flower

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    :setf_023: :setf_013: I will get em for us all!! I swear they stole my memory also
     



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  6. Netty

    Netty Chaotic Gardener Plants Contributor

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    I recently discovered that the clothes-shrinking thieves have been in my closet! :D
     
  7. SongofJoy57

    SongofJoy57 In Flower

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    This happened to me too! Now I know the rest of the story.
     
  8. glendann

    glendann Official Garden Angel

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    Yes,Me too Eileen and like Playtime my memory was stolen too :D :eek: :-D , :-D , :smt021 :rolleyes: .We need to get this kind of thing stopped
     

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