High School Reunions

Discussion in 'Jokes and Games' started by Henry Johnson, Dec 6, 2012.

  1. Henry Johnson

    Henry Johnson In Flower

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    Just thought I would post something about summertime activities that we could chuckle about while we huddle around our heaters and fireplaces...
    ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
    High School Reunions
    Every five years, as summertime nears,
    An announcement arrives in the mail,
    "A reunion is planned; it'll be really grand;
    Make plans to attend without fail."
    I'll never forget the first time we met;
    We tried so hard to impress.
    We drove fancy cars, smoked big cigars,
    And wore our most elegant dress.
    It was quite an affair; the whole class was there.
    It was held at a fancy hotel.
    We wined and we dined and we acted refined,
    And everyone thought it was swell.
    The men all conversed about who had been first
    To achieve great fortune and fame.
    Meanwhile, their spouses described their fine houses
    And how beautiful their children became.
    The homecoming queen, who once had been lean,
    Now weighed in at one-ninety-six.
    The jocks who were there had all lost their hair,
    And the cheerleaders could no more do kicks.
    No one had heard about the class nerd
    Who'd guided a spacecraft to the moon;
    Or poor little Jane, who'd always been plain;
    She married a shipping tycoon.
    The boy we'd decreed "most apt to succeed"
    Was serving ten years in the pen,
    While the one voted "least" now was a priest;
    Shows you can be wrong now and then.
    They awarded a prize to one of the guys
    Who seemed to have aged the least.
    Another was given to the grad who had driven
    The farthest to attend the feast.
    They took a class picture, a curious mixture
    Of beehives, crew cuts and wide ties.
    Tall, short or skinny, the style was the mini;
    You never saw so many thighs.
    At our next get-together, no one cared whether
    They impressed their classmates or not.
    The mood was informal, a whole lot more normal;
    By this time we'd all gone to pot.
    It was held out-of-doors, at the lake shores;
    We ate hamburgers, coleslaw and beans.
    Then most of us lay around in the shade,
    In our comfortable T-shirts and jeans.
    By the fortieth year, it was abundantly clear,
    We were definitely over the hill.
    Those who weren't dead had to crawl out of bed,
    And be home in time for their pill.
    And now I can't wait; they've just set the date;
    Our fiftieth is coming, I'm told.
    It should be a ball, they've rented a hall
    At the shady Rest Home for the old.
    Repairs have been made on my hearing aid;
    My pacemaker's been turned up on high.
    My wheelchair is oiled, my teeth have been boiled;
    And I've bought a new wig and glass eye.
    I'm feeling quite hearty, I'm ready to party;
    I'll dance 'til the dawn's early light.
    It'll be lots of fun; I just hope there's one
    Other person who gets there that night.
    ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
    Chuckle, chuckle, anybody relate?
    Love to all, Hank.
     
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  3. eileen

    eileen Resident Taxonomist Staff Member Moderator Plants Contributor

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    I'm so glad we don't hold High School reunions here. I've already got more spare parts than I could ever wish for - if there's a scrap merchant around then he'd definitely love me!! I'm worth more now than I ever was. :D :D
     
  4. carolyn

    carolyn Strong Ash

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    Henry, That is pretty funny. I have never gone to any of my class reunions.
     
  5. toni

    toni Mistress of Garden Junque Staff Member Moderator Plants Contributor

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    My 50th is coming up in 2014 and I am not going. Haven't been to any, why start then.

    The info about our 40th noted that there would a $75 a person dinner Friday night and then the guys would spend Saturday afternoon playing golf at the local country club and the gals would spend the day shopping.

    I figured if we all met at a local diner like we went to when we were young and the guys would spend Saturday at the local pistol/rifle range and the women would spend that time scrounging through local junque and thrift stores I might have been interested in going. ;)
     

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