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Hi, sorry about my absences in the last weeks.

My younger sister suffered a sudden death for no reason that could be found on the pm. I was beside myself and could not stop crying. I cried in the street, on the bus.

My emotional state was in tatters, it still is but slowly emerging from the fog. I never even went to my own sites to update. I think she suffered a a very bad migraine attack and went to bed. We know she meant to come back down stairs because I now hear she lit a candle down stairs something she did daily. With her home full to the brim with music media of every kind had the candle toppled and lit the leather suite it would have been too unbearable to Imagine.

Her hubby found her when he came in from work.

These sudden deaths are becoming common place, there was another in Borneo this morning. I am on the Borneo list and a researcher is researching the medical anthropological project on these conditions and sudden death...its that bad. He calls it, or believes it to be form of lethal Arrythmia, or even some undetected cardiomyopathy.

High blood pressure/Diabetes/smoking/diet/lack of exercise all play a part and if your not taking your medication then thats what happens like with my sister.

Please, get your checks regular.

I had all my checks since and yesterday an ECG which was normal.

If there is anyone from South East Asia and suffered sudden death could you let me know then I can pass it on to the researcher. Anything from Malaysia/Borneo/Sarawak.

Thanks. the more we know the better how to look after people.

K

 

Oh, Kate, I cannot express sufficiently the sympathy I feel for you at this time. Grieve, and then remember all the good, funny, happy times you had with your sister. God bless you and your family.

 

Kate, I am so sad for you and extend my deepest sympathy to you and your family. Even if there was an explanation it doesn't make it any easier. Time doesn't make it easier, either, you are just get more used to it at that point. You will always remember her. you will never forget her, either. Every holiday every birthday etc... you will always remember her... and shed a few or a lot of tears. that is normal. You can't box up your grief and think I have grieved long enough it is time to move on... it doesn't work that way. You will need to work through it on your own time frame and in your own way but don't hesitate to talk to someone about her if you are really struggling with her loss. Make a journal write your way through the process if that is what works for you. Ask those who have gone through it to help you. I wish I could hug you. I have had that loss and I even tear up thinking about it now and it had been 25 years since I lost my brother. May you all feel my prayers for comfort.

 

I'm so sorry to hear about your sister. Sending my condolences and prayers for your family.

 

Sis looked after me when I suffered a major panic attack in 1996, I lived with her and family for two years then I was housed under the wing of a warden. Its our daily phone chats I miss the most. I did'nt go to view her afterwards because I had seen her the day before.

I asked her by phone if she wanted any speakers she said yes please. For reasons unknown to me my son called round the day before her death and asked do I need to go anywhere? I said yes to see my sister with the speakers. Although I went regular during the year (she lived 30 miles away) I usually went on the bus. The speakers being surround sound they were too heavy for me to carry. I had an appointment that day as well or I would have stayed longer which I told her and kissed her goodbye till my birthday which was the 24th as she died on the 5th.

She wanted me to sign in to her Ancestry account from my home, she could'nt sign out because she had forgot her password. Ancestry was having none of it for obvious reasons to do with security. I said when I called next time I would look to see who our Ancesters were she had found, she had got to the 1800s.

Her only daughter who rang her several times a day was a pall bearer at her funeral. I thought that was really a big thing for a daughter suffering in Grief.

Many thanks everyone for your kind words.

 

Katte, I am so sorry for you loss. It is a sad thing to go through. My prayers go out to you.