So......my boyfriend Ed (I hate referring to him that way...I mean, we're senior citizens!!!) anyway, my guy and I have started talking about moving in together. Can you tell it's freaking me out some??? Even though I'm also excited about the prospect?? It wasn't too very long ago, after I left my abusive, controlling ex, that I considered all men, other than my boys and my brother, to be scum of the earth and not to be trusted!! I joke about it, but seriously I was in very bad shape in relationship to the opposite sex. I had zero...ZERO...trust in men. I went out of my way to avoid men. I wouldn't have a male dentist or doctor, my hair person was female, I'd even choose my checkout line at the grocery store based on what gender was serving. It was bad. I had serious issues. Fast forward 10 years and a lot of therapy and a lot of dance (therapy of a whole other kind and it loomed very large in my healing from the abuse and control) and I'm in much better shape emotionally and mentally. Still, this is huge for me, to be considering this. HUGE!!! It won't happen till sometime after my daughter has her next baby....Paige is due mid-July and I take a week off work when she has the baby to help out. Then I'm over most nights after work for a month or so. Then every several days after that. So even if I were moved in by then, Ed wouldn't see much of me anyway. Meanwhile we're working on his house. He let things go after his divorce so it was a bit of a mess. And I'm such an organizing freak that it's recreational for me to bring order to chaos, so we've been having a lot of fun bringing his house back up to par, room by room, while also planning the potential of us living together. Anyway, that's my latest news! Somehow it doesn't seem "official" until I've shared it with my Stewie family.
Ohboyohboyohboy, how exciting! Yes, I understand that this is a very big thing for you. 20+ years ago I was in a similar situation. The thought of a new man in my life was non-existent. But things happen, attitudes change and wounds heal. I wish you both the best of luck! Please tell Paige to have her baby on July 14th. If it's a girl she can call her Marie and sing La Marseillaise for her every year. My youngest daughter thinks it unfair that she's the only one on the planet who gets that for her birthday.
How very exciting, Ronni! Of course you have many different emotions all swirling around together, but I predict that as you give your mind and heart time to metabolize everything, and sift it all out without being forced on any particular time schedule, clarity will dominate. You deserve EVERY happiness.
I was in a similar situation almost 40 years ago so it surprised the heck out of me when saying yes to Randy when he proposed in his own special, but strange, way seemed like the most normal thing in the world to do. Like the hippie generation used to say....if it feels good, do it.
You sound happy and that's the main thing to consider. My advice,,relax and do not take anything too seriously. Whatever problems arise are usually easier to solve than you think at the time.
I can understand you being a bit undecided but things do have a way of working themselves out. I've never had the problem having been married almost 55 years. That makes me a senior citizen, too and it is never easy to make decisions on a daily basis. I hope you can decide in your favor and have a happy life to come. dooley
Thanks guys. This is a really big step for me....a step that I'd never thought I would ever take again, if you'd asked me a few years ago. Time and emotional recovery and healing sure does change things.
