While I was weeding today, I thought of many of the small kindnesses I've received. No one has offered me $100,000, but the memory of the kindness has lasted longer than the money ever would have! Chuck at the feed store offered to come unload the 50 lb. bags of chicken feed when he got off work (he doesn't pass our farm on his way home). Marvin who lives down the road came with his tractor and dug up the Pampas grass lumps so we could put in white fencing with red roses instead of those ghastly overgrown clumps of half-dead grasses. Margaret came with cookies and sympathy when Walt cut his thumb so badly. Karen saw that the company she works for was tossing out greenhouse trays, and rescued them for me to use. These are only a very few of the very many kindnesses we've received. When I count my blessings I'm heading toward the hundreds! Do you have small but oh-so-important kindnesses done for you?
It is so good to remember those little blessings on those quiet days. I personally have been so blessed with kind gestures my whole life. I like to pass it along to others and always have done that. It's a good thing.
Greats post. Thanks for the reminder to think about the small, kind acts that others have blessed us with.
I did have just yesterday... My dear friend down the road brought me home baked bread and cupcakes (for my b-day later this month) . She didn't need to even think of me for such. Then another neighbor called and asked if I could use some egg cartons (they must have gotten rid of the chickens) today I found 200-300 egg cartons in the shed. They could have thrown them in the trash and here I was thinking I was getting low on boxes. I hope I am as thoughtful, but I worry I am not. Maybe I do things that aren't really thoughtful to me (more of being everyday kindnesses), but they are to others.
Many members here are extremely kind and thoughtful. That's why I love it here. I really love all of our relationships. Everyone is willing to share and help or support others here. My sister and I have always taken gentle and special care of waitresses and check out girls. We may compliment their hair or smile or what they are wearing. It just makes their day and puts a real big smile on their faces. There is always something you can find that is very positive about someone. Those 2 jobs probably get the most abuse from the public. Carolyn, You are a very good human being. don't you worry about not being thoughtful. You are..... I am probably the most sentimental one here. Tell me you love my shirt and you will get a BIG smile.
Well, today my persona in real life has been shaped (deliberately by my own self) in such a way - That a very clear message is sent out, of I don't want to know you, and you don't want to know me. Kind of like the gladiators just before entering the Colosseum... Not trying to spoil everyone's mood over here, but am just saying that in my experience, specially in today's world - No good deed ever goes unpunished... When I was in my early teens, I (as an act of kindness) stupidly fixed a neighbor's car once. But the price that I had to pay was that - I very quickly became known as the handyman of the neighborhood, (that anybody could call over for free). So in the next few years I was called over 100s of times - To fix the TV, the fridge, the water heater, the water pump, the AC, the dish antenna, and even all their computer crashes too. Sigh... There is another dimension of such neighborly abuse too, but of a slightly different kind (that I got in my late teens from one neighbor). But that I will not talk about here in the open. So send me a private message if any of you really want to know. Or simply go see this movie (or song) to get an idea: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-3lKbMBab18 http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bE1dz6_u2JI Anyway, Dustin Hoffman's character of Benjamin Braddock (Benjy) in that movie was unimaginably stupid, as he really fell into such a trap - However I didn't (and I am still proud to say that I didn't). But the price I had to pay was that she started to spread false rumors about me in the unofficial housewives club! That I was a user of drugs, and what not, (to preemptively tarnish my own image, in case I ever opened my mouth in front of anybody, I wouldn't be taken seriously)... My own mother died when I was 9, so years later when this happened - I had no one to take my side in this "housewives club", or call it the gossip factory... And so every bit of this nasty gossip stuck on me real good! So this is why, when I moved out of that stupid neighborhood - I swore that from now on, I will never show any kindness to anyone. Unless there is a genuine and serious threat to someone's life, (that my intervening will avert). Otherwise I won't even move a finger for that either... However, like Waretrop - I too am always very nice to the waiters and specially waitresses. Not because their job is a thankless one, and they also don't get paid well for it - But strictly because they are the last people to touch my food! But as for showing general kindness to others (specially the neighbors). Well, I gave all that I had to give in life. So now my tank is totally empty, (so to speak). Therefore whenever any neighbor ever comes to me for assistance, I simply say: Your fate is your own! As doing this puts a very BIG smile on my face... HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!! I guess this also explains why I like plants and tree so much, and why I am so active over here at The GardenStew - At least shrubbery doesn't gossip behind my back! "Where have you gone, Joe DiMaggio? A nation turns its lonely eyes to you (Woo woo woo) What’s that you say, Mrs. Robinson ‘Joltin Joe’ has left and gone away? (Hey hey hey – hey hey hey)..."
Well, I just feel that kindness works much better than hostility. I also don't stand next to "users". We shouldn't be anger about others that don't think like us but we don't have to fall for their tricks either. I was not talking about working for free or being taken advantage of but just being kind to others. that is really a better way.... I really don't like to debate...just do things that others will feel good over. Everyone has a good point...and we all have faults. That's for sure.
This just reminded me of something very interesting, that many people are not aware of. Of how irreparable wounds too can be healed today. Please see these videos one by one: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JPXHhLS9E9U http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LIlEsG4pdjM http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MZdS0tDyS0w http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QzfgwQEQoFk Here is the company which makes this powder: http://acell.com/ And here is their whole range of products: http://acell.com/matristem-product-list/ Now whenever I post a link of some product, I like to post more then just one link (of other similar products, yet from different companies) - So as to not seem as if I am discreetly promoting an advertising agenda. But unfortunately, this company is right now the only one in the world that is making this stuff... Many people and doctors too are not aware of this, however the technology is already here. And as times goes by, things will only improve. And the interest of more people in this will naturally promote more progress - And more choices from different companies down the line. Sorry for drifting off topic over here, but I feel I had to mention this. As many of us like to work with our own hands, and often we do sometimes face serious risk of such injuries...
Bringing this thread back on topic, I really appreciate the small kindnesses also. Sometimes someone will just give you a tiny gift, simply just because, and it can take you aback. Can turn a crummy day into a great one! I agree with Barb also that we have a talent for small kindnesses here at GardenStew
Yesterday was May Day and a staff member went to the trouble of getting small bouquets of flowers for everybody. It sure made the rest of my work week as I got to enjoy the flowers at odd moments throughout the day. I brought in scarlet runner bean seeds last week for students to sprout. What smiles I got as they watched their seeds come to life and roots began to escape the bottom of the pots. To have so much curiosity and joy...I'd forgotten how much fun it is to see a bean start the next part of the cycle. I get so locked in looking forward I often forget to just enjoy each moment. When we do small kindnesses I find we not only help to make someone else's day, but we also enrich our own lives. I know it is so true for myself. As I study and learn it is amazing how we create our own reality. Science about the brain is discovering and proving that we can choose our perceptions/emotions of life and that just smiling can change the body's chemistry. Since I work with students identified as socially-emotionally disabled I am taking classes and trying to incorporate more updated research on mindset and emotional intelligence into the curriculum. The students are loving learning about their brains and how their thoughts affect their body chemistry which in turn affects how they feel. They and I are learning how to monitor feelings and learn that our brains will always find/create a problem if we let it. Science is also proving the validity of tried and true practices for calming yourself. I find all the brain science fascinating. Keeping smiling and sharing your caring thoughts. It sure makes my day just seeing or hearing about someone being kind or courteous to someone in the simplest of ways. When someone extends that smile to me it makes my heart sing...silly me. Sorry Marlingardener for caring on so. I just love feeling good and your post really just reinforced everything I am feeling, learning and trying to accomplish for myself Thanks
Marlingardener, I read your beautiful post first yesterday. I got so emotional that I couldn't respond. I agree with so many as quoted so I wont go on to repeat. I will say, you truly made my day and I went away with a big grin on my face. It is wonderful to hear that folks are still kind,thoughtful and caring for one another in a world that is so hurting. We never know when we will change a life forever by one simple act of kindness. I do know that when you give you will receive in abundance. Thank you for posting!
People thanking me for doing my job. That's always nice. Even nicer when it's done with cash :twisted: . Makes me go out of my way to thank folks for working weekends. Did that for 26 years, can't thank people enough for that. A neighbor 'doing' the trimming as I finish cutting the grass. Just because he already had his trimmer out and running. Another neighbor making sure my trash gets put out. Yeah, I know, how could a trashman forget that?
I knew it, I just KNEW it! Members here are kind and helpful without expecting any "payment" so the payment comes in the form of reciprocated kindness. I'm so proud to know all of you!
Because I'm at home all the time I will take care of any packages that might arrive for my neighbours,to save them the hassle of traipsing across town to the sorting office to collect them-all the delivery drivers know this and knock on the door( more friends for Buddy and Nyla). When we came home early from our holiday because of Mark's bad back I was emptying the car one or two items at a time( because of my bad back) and eventually all there was to do was the heavy suitcases which I would never have been able to manage.Just as I was reaching that conclusion one of the neighbours who I regularly take parcels for was coming home from work and immediately offered to carry all those heavy bags indoors for me!I didn't have to ask. That really made my day! Excellent thread Jane.
Just yesterday, the kids' neighbor Paul delivered to the side of the house several wheelbarrows worth of lovely stones that he'd gathered from the nearby hill. I'd been eyeing them for a couple of weeks, and had commented to him when we were both outside tending our gardens, that they'd be perfect as edging stones for the front garden. I asked him if he had a wheelbarrow that I could borrow, when I got around to gathering them. He said sure! And then delivered those stones to me instead! I am a very firm believer in the "paying it forward" approach. I don't know that I can ever repay Paul's kindness to me (though I'll be looking for opportunities!) but even if not, I will be sure to do some small kindness for someone else, because it makes me feel good, and because I just have this idea, however silly, that if we all keep the kindnesses flowing, it will make the world (or at least our little corner of it) a better place!
