The Purina Diet

Discussion in 'Jokes and Games' started by toni, Aug 22, 2006.

  1. toni

    toni Mistress of Garden Junque Staff Member Moderator Plants Contributor

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    I was in Wal-Mart buying a large bag of Purina for my Labrador Retriever
    and was in line to check out.

    A woman behind me asked if I had a dog.

    On impulse, I told her that no, I was starting The Purina Diet again,
    although I probably shouldn't because I'd ended up in the hospital last
    time, but that I'd lost 50 pounds before I awakened in an intensive care
    ward with tubes coming out of most of my orifices and IVs in both arms.

    I told her that it was essentially a perfect diet and that the way that it
    works is to load your pants pockets with Purina nuggets and simply eat one
    or two every time you feel hungry & that the food is nutritionally complete
    so I was going to try it again.

    I have to mention here that practically everyone in the line was by now
    enthralled with my story, particularly a tall guy behind her.

    Horrified, she asked if I'd been poisoned and was that why I was in the
    hospital.

    I said no.....I'd been sitting in the street licking my butt and a car hit
    me.

    I thought the tall guy was going to have to be carried out the door.
     
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  3. eileen

    eileen Resident Taxonomist Staff Member Moderator Plants Contributor

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    :D :D Ahhhhh Toni you certainly know how to make me laugh!!! I enjoyed that - thank you.
     
  4. Frank

    Frank GardenStew Founder Staff Member Administrator

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    Cheeky Toni :D
     
  5. glendann

    glendann Official Garden Angel

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    :rofl: That is to funny .My Oreo is looking at me like I lost my mind .Me laughing so hard and just me and Oreo here.
     
  6. jubabe296

    jubabe296 Official Garden Fairy

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    That's funny Toni!!
     

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