You know its hot in Texas when

Discussion in 'Jokes and Games' started by glendann, Aug 7, 2006.

  1. glendann

    glendann Official Garden Angel

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    Frank I really wasn't sure where this belongs here but it is a joke. :D

    This is how hot it has been in Texas the last couple of weeks.......


    You know it's hot when:

    ***The birds have to use potholders to pull worms
    Out of the ground.

    ***The trees are whistling for the dogs.


    ***The best parking place is determined by shade instead of distance



    ***Hot water now comes out of both taps.

    ***You can make sun tea instantly.


    ***You learn that a seat belt buckle makes a pretty good branding iron

    ***The temperature drops below 95 and you feel a little
    Chilly.


    ****You discover it only takes two fingers to steer your
    Car.

    ***You actually burn your hand opening the car door.

    ***Your biggest bicycle wreck fear is, "What if I get
    Knocked out and end up lying on the pavement and cook to
    Death?"

    ***You realize asphalt has a liquid state.


    ***The potato's cook underground, so all you have to do is pull one out and add butter, salt and pepper.

    ***Farmers are feeding their chickens crushed ice to keep them from laying boiled eggs.

    ***The cows are giving evaporated milk.


    ***You'd rather starve to death than cook dinner.
     
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  3. Frank

    Frank GardenStew Founder Staff Member Administrator

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    How does that work? 8)
     
  4. glendann

    glendann Official Garden Angel

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    :rofl: Frank you guess .Too funny :D
     
  5. dooley

    dooley Super Garden Turtle

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    Did you never see a dog stop and lift it's leg by a tree? Dooley
     



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  6. Frank

    Frank GardenStew Founder Staff Member Administrator

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    Indeed I did. It's just the tree whistling bit that perturbed me.
     
  7. glendann

    glendann Official Garden Angel

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    They need water desperate :sete_010: :-D
     
  8. Capt Kirk

    Capt Kirk Thank a Veteran today!

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    This morning on the radio they were talking about a lady that bakes cookies on the dash of her car. When she gets to work, she puts a tray with drops of cookie dough on the dash of her car. When she gets off work, she has baked fresh cookies!
     
  9. Primsong

    Primsong Young Pine

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    I like the one with the birds using potholders. :-D And now I want to try the cookie-baking experiment the next time it gets really hot over here, yum.
     
  10. Frank

    Frank GardenStew Founder Staff Member Administrator

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    Amazing. I don't doubt that is possible for a second.
     
  11. glendann

    glendann Official Garden Angel

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    You know if you try that in Texas you better like burned cookies. :D
     
  12. prairiefeather

    prairiefeather New Seed

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    Maybe I'm odd, but I dried two thick, 100%cotton, fluffy bathroom rugs on the hood of my car a fews days ago. Didnt take long, and far cheaper than running the dryer for an hour.
     

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