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BOOM Part II: The Big Tease

Category: Apocalypse Gardening | Posted: Fri Apr 17, 2009 9:42 pm

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So I took some "before" pictures, but due our new internet and an aging computer, the Husband had to... well I don't know what to call it, but delete and reload everything. Somehow we lost the photo upload program.

If he is not freakishly overburdened at work, I'll have him work some magic before I head out to Nevada on Monday.

I took the pictures for a lark, to show you all how ugly it really is. Upon doing so, I tiptoed over to get a shot of the previously mentioned shopping cart, fearing that the old man might be hiding in a tree. Waiting.

As a rounded the corner with my camera ready I Saw It ...





A N O T H E R S H O P P I N G C A R T!?!?!



He's been upping the ante. Gearing up on old shopping carts like it was going out of fashion. What could this mean? What is his plan of action? Where will it take us? Things that I can only wonder about on sleepless nights, perched at my window. Waiting for the unmistakable sound of creaky bearings on the approach.

In other news;
I purchased my Miniature Apple Tree; a freak result or root grafting and Mad Science. It had been on hold for a week at the local Ace Hardware, where a family friend, Miss Judy, is the Home & Garden Buyer/Overlord. Apparently the tree will grow in a container permanently and produces about 50 apples a year once it's mature. This year I'll have about 7, if every bud blooms and is pollinated.

Miss Judy is fast becoming my garden mentor, being a certified Master Gardener herself. After my ecstatic purchase, we visited her house to borrow the Rototiller.

AND since Neighbor Porter works at a winery as a delivery person, he has access to either free or deep-discount halved wine barrels. In fact, he is supposed to find out today What The Score Is. My only request was; "As much as we could get our hands on immediately."

Over and Out.

Last edited: Fri Apr 17, 2009 10:08 pm

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BOOM!

Category: Life as a Vexx | Posted: Wed Apr 15, 2009 12:37 pm

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A triumphant return from our second internet exodus!
What a magical time to be back.

Let me tell you a little about the Vexx-Porter Compound...
Since August Robbie and I have been enjoying a CHOICE living situation. In the heart of N. Salem's dilapidated underbelly lies a decent sized lot, same as everyone elses on the street. But this one is rad beyond comprehension. Why, you might ask?

Two tiny identical houses, one visible from the street and the other hidden from prying eyes and accessible only through an unnamed alleyway. Both freakishly affordable.

Our dearest friend, Porter, occupies Compound East. The "dog yard" faces the street and provides his Pitbull and Rottweiler mutts with ample space to engage in general destruction.

Behind Compound East are the communal grounds, incidentally his back/our front yard. This includes the 30X30 Apocalypse Garden East where cooler season crops will be grown in the warmer months.

Then there's Compound West, where Mr. and Mrs. Vexx reside. And yet another yard behind that where Apocalypse Garden West will grow enough tomatoes etc. to feed the masses.

The frenzy has begun, my friends. The kitchen window is brimming with indoor starts. The Radishes and Carrots are growing happily. I came home a few days ago with a truck-bed full of vegetables I didn't need, but could not live without.

And the only logical conclusion, the climax if you will, to these righteous amounts of future vegetation is our own Oktoberfest. This will have to include a strange combination of loud music, home-brewed beer from some friends, a smorgasbord of vegetarian fare and merriment with a vengeance. And Otis Redding. It's never a party until you full-tilt boogie to Otis.

One of the many benefits to our New Deal is Porter's willingness to help with the gardens. Mr. Vexx generally despises yard work and it doesn't agree with his back, so the assistance is welcomed with much enthusiasm.

After I rototill this weekend, I'll try and post pictures. It ain't pretty, by any means. What almost passed as our lawn was really 20 years of neglect and weeds, I had to kill all of it. The horizon is the back of 2 decrepit houses. For reasons I don't care to ponder, an old man pushed a very rusty shopping cart with a terrifying stuffed monkey, a gnarled hub cap and who knows what else in the driveway facing ours. I don't know if it's his house, but whoever lives there doesn't seem to mind because it's been there for a month. The image of him shuffling down the alley, with a look of distinct purpose and accomplishment as he parked his cart still haunts me.


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