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In Loving Memory of my Daddy- Glendann's husband

Category: My Family | Posted: Tue Sep 09, 2008 7:26 am

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10 years ago, I lost my best friend, my Daddy. He had throat cancer and his death wasn't quick at all. He suffered so much those last few days. It still hurts today like it did back then. For some weird reason that Friday before he passed away, my friend Marisa asked me if instead of going to our favorite club, could we just take a trip back home. So that is what we did. But on the way to our home town, Marisa's grandmother called her cell phone and asked her where we were and she told her that we were on our way home and she said to drive faster because my daddy had just went into a coma. So poor Marisa floored it to Madisonville, and this whole time, she didn't want to tell me about daddy. She just wanted to get me there.

So when I got there, I stayed by his side. I didn't sleep for 2 days straight and finally I was so exhausted I just went to get a little sleep. But I just put a pillow on the floor and slept next to daddy's hospital bed that was in our house. Then, like 30 minutes after I dozed off, I hear a voice say "Baby, when did you get here?" It was daddy, awake from the coma! I couldn't believe it! I told him that I had been there since Friday and when he realized that he had been in a coma, he knew God was ready for another angel. So that whole day, we all just sat around telling each other how much we loved each other and that we would take care of Mama for him. He refused to take the morphine that eased the pain because he knew that if he went back to sleep, he may never wake up. So he put it off for as long as he could and when he did...he slipped back into a coma. When you start the process of dying, your body can't regulate its temperature so you are hot one minute and sweating, then it would stop and a few minutes later, you would start sweating again. I spent most of those last days lying in the bed with him and when he would start to sweat; I would wipe his face off so sweat wouldn't roll into his eyes and burn them.

On that last day, my Aunt Carol and Uncle Sonny came over to visit and see if we needed anything. Daddy's hospice nurse had just changed all his bed sheets and gave him a bath and put new pajamas on him. My aunt and uncle were just about to leave and my mom and brother walked them outside. I was sitting next to my dad and was just watching him trying to breathe. Many of you may have never been around a person that is terminally ill, but in the last few days of life the person gets what they call the death rattle. It's a rattling or gurgling with each breath that is from secretions in the back of the throat. His breaths started to slow down and it would be like almost 60 seconds between each breath. So I ran to the door and screamed for my mom and the rest of my family that was about to leave and my mom, brother and I huddled around him and my mom and I held his hand and my brother was on the other side with his hand on my daddy's other arm. We just kept telling how much we loved him and that we would be ok and he could just let go and go be with Jesus. Then he took one last breath and we kept talking to him until I felt his pulse fade away...

I was so blessed to have been able to be there for him in those last few moments on earth. I think about him every day. I think the hardest thing about him being gone is that he never got to walk me down the aisle when I got married. He never got to hold his two precious grandsons. He would have spoiled them so much. And now that I am going through one of the toughest times of my life, I maybe almost 33 years old, but right now the thing I need the most is my daddy. I know he is watching over my sons and me, but it just isn't the same. I would give anything just to hear him call me Baby girl one more time. I miss his laugh, his hugs, his jokes...there are so many things...He was such a kind and loving man and he is greatly missed by many.

If your daddy is still alive, or even your mom...call them every day and tell them you love them.

Because we are never promised tomorrow

Daddy

"Uh huh dear", my daddy would say

Not sure of what he agreed to, he would quickly sneak away

The hood went up and down he went

Into that engine block

So engaged in that car, unaware of any clock

Hours later, there he was, still working away

He may stop for a pizza but then it's off to play

I'm not sure if those cars were even broke

You really can't be sure

But as daddy dove into them

He'd swear to you they were

There's nothing that made daddy smile like he did

As he worked away

Except if there were kids around

He loved to stop and play

There was something about daddy

That kids just had to adore

Maybe it was his unending patience

Or the way he came back for more

Or maybe it was the smile he tried to hide

The one that turned his forehead red

And gave him away when he lied

Or maybe it was those stories he told

Leaving work and on his way home

Laughing so hard

Trying to tell us of the chest

That started to roam

"I tried to give her directions" he laughed

As he recalled the fall

"I just can't believe, there it was, the whole breast and all!"

Daddy loved to play practical jokes

The ones that made you laugh until you cried

I'm not sure what I miss the most

Since my daddy died

I think that I miss him being my rock

The one whom I relied

I miss him so much

It's really hard

To not see his face

Or maybe what I miss the most

Is the strength of his embrace

No matter how hard I think

I just can't pick one

I miss each and everything

I miss us having fun

It hit me like a ton of bricks

Even though I had time to prepare

I'm sorry I wasn't ready

I thought you would always be there

But with a sigh, I'll blow you a kiss

You will always be the one I miss

By Misty Judson

I miss you Daddy!

2-17-1937 ~ 9-8-1998



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In Loving Memory of my Nannie- Glendann's mom

Category: My Family | Posted: Sat Sep 06, 2008 4:36 am

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Nannie
08-02-1912 ~ 09-05-1998
Most of you that know me know that I talk about one very special lady that was in my life. My grandmother..we called her Nannie. If you were lucky enough to have met her, you wouldn't have ever forgotten her. She was your typical Nannie, but with a little more spunk than most. I lived with her when I was in high school cause she couldn't be alone, just in case she fell,etc. Most grandmother/granddaughters have endearing nicknames for each other like Sweetie,Honey..not Nannie and I..I called her Butthole and she called me A**hole...it was always in good fun and that was just the kind of sense of humor she had. She was always playing little jokes on people and loved ever minute of it.

I was devastated when she passed away, but I knew she was so miserable here on Earth..so I knew it was time for her to go and be with all her siblings and her parents in Heaven. She talked to me about the fact that she knew she was dying and that it was ok and that we needed to focus more on my daddy, who was also dying of cancer at that time. She said " Your dad needs the attention now..he is sick, I'm just old" I still remember the day she passed away like it was yesterday. My mom,brother and I were torn because the day Nannie died, my dad had just slipped into a coma. So we went to the hospital to see Nannie, but couldn't stay too long cause we didn't want my dad to die without us by his side. So as Nannie struggled to take her last breaths, we went into her ICU room and said our goodbyes. She was able to hear and see us so she knew who was talking to her. She had emphysema had it took all the strength she had to take those last breaths. So my uncle stayed with Nannie so that we could get back to Daddy. She died that afternoon.

I sometimes felt like after Nannie died, then three days later my dad followed, that I didn't get a chance to really grieve Nannie's death because Daddy was so sick and then he died. But now that I look back, that was exactly what she wanted.

I was telling a friend of mine here in Billings about some funny stories about Nannie and she went home and wrote a poem about Nannie and she also wrote one about my daddy. So, if you knew her..this poem will bring back good memories. If you didn't know her..maybe you will read this and have a deeper connection to your own grandmother. You can learn so much about life from the elderly because they lived it. I still have a soft spot for older people and I contribute that to my Nannie. So when you see a old person having trouble opening a door, or walking a little slower than you..think about my Nannie and give them a hand, or even a kind word. That would make their day.

Nannie

Oh my Nannie it's funny to think
She would fight for her family and wouldn't even blink
She would stand her ground until the end
She was a fiesty little thing that wouldn't bend
She was a country women who would tell ya what she thought
if you didn't do what cha should, she'd tell you ya ought
Hurt feelings, no way, it's just how it was
Don't get her wrong though, she was on your side til the end just because
If you didn't like it when she gave her opinion, it was just to bad
She was the first one to tell you when there were words to be had
She supported her family whether they were right or wrong
She wasn't the typical southern belle
oh no, Nannie was strong
She would be your best friend when you needed her most
She would open her home to a dozen and be the perfect host
ummmmm hmmmmmm I can smell it now
That southern cook'n only Nannie knew how
I can close your eyes and see it, I swear
A table stacked full and Nannie right there
If she wasnt cooking, there was one other place she would be
Buried deep in a watermelon,
her hair the only thing you could see
Watermelon from one side of her face to other
"Couldn't reach my fork" she said, without even a studder
Nicknames you gave
not the nicest names sure
But we loved each other and they were just what they were
"Ya know that I'm dying"
words she said
Who knew they would resound in your head
Going out like a fighter, she was destined to go
I'll kick the trash can when I get there that way you'll know
And kicked it she did
I knew that she would
Her little way to say I'm here and I'm good
See ya'll soon but until that time
I gotta go
I have the biggest slice of watermelon waiting for me, ya know.

By Misty Judson

I love and miss you with all my heart Nannie. I know you are with me always and help me in all that I do
Thank you for your wisdom,sense of humor
and your love of cooking.
Play a game of solitare
while you wait for the rest of us
And remember, save the second biggest
slice of watermelon for me!!


Last edited: Sat Sep 06, 2008 4:41 am

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